So, you are being asked out on a date???
A little nerve-wracking? Absolutely.
First dates are a sure source of those “butterflies” feelings, at the same time flooding the brain with feel-good dopamine.
But, let’s face it: Dates can be a little awkward as well. Even if you memorized their Tinder profile (I know they like soccer, so I’ll bring up this hilarious David Beckham video), conversation can quickly fall flat. And if all else fails, we start to talk about the things around us, from the food we’re eating to the cricket game playing on the TV.
“It’s such an intense moment,” .There are a lot of emotions, and you’re not really sure what you want in the other person.” So I took the issue of awkward dates head on in my master’s thesis project ;P.
These are some tips that could make First/Consecutive Dates way more Successful.
- Plan the date-
Yes, Have an answer for when and where the date will be. Surprises can be very exciting but trust me they can have an equally opposite effect at times.
Try to pick a location that’s comfortable and conducive to conversation. While movie dates are popular, they’re not great for first dates as you’ll both be staring at a screen all night.
- Speak Up-
Nobody likes a pushover, so if your date tells you he/she’s planned an evening at a sushi restaurant and you don’t eat fish, or he wants to hang at a cocktail lounge but you don’t drink, speak up. It’ll only look strange if you tell him all that after you’re already seated and waiting to order.
- Dress to Impress–
DON’T wear things that you can’t walk, eat, breathe, or talk in.
Obviously, you want to look your best, but a first date isn’t the time to take those new 5-inch stilettos out for a road test, or wear that dress that’s a little too tight.
Dates are already anxiety-filled and being uncomfortable in your clothes only makes it worse.
- Guys Pay Attention–
Show up on time. And be gracious if she’s fashionably late. (She probably just doesn’t want to show up before you get there.).
Prove that chivalry is not dead. Sure, she’s an independent woman. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t open the door for her or pick up the chair for her.
- Bid a Good-Bye to your Cellphone-
Your Facebook friends and Twitter followers aren’t invited on the date.
The act of obsessively checking your phone every two minutes could be a bonafide deal breaker. There’s nothing ruder than trying to have a conversation with a person who’s constantly stating at their screens.
- Eat More- Drink Less-
Some people try to avoid eating or try to eat very little while dating. If you think not ordering dinner will make you appear skinnier, prettier, more health conscious ,guess what? It won’t. It will probably make your date a little uncomfortable.
In opposition, if you people are planning your date in a Lounge or a Bar, don’t go beyond your limits. Sure, a cocktail or two can be fun and loosen the mood, but knowing your limits will help make a better first impression.
Your date might likely put some effort into his/her look for you, so offer a compliment or two. Avoid a never-ending list of praise — it can get overwhelming — or comments that sound too sexual. “Beautiful” or “Handsome” is always better than “smoking’ or “sexy.”
- Offer to pay-
A tactful way to do this is to simply reach for the check when it comes. If your date insists, offer to split the bill, or at least leave the tip.
- Say Good Bye/Night-
Don’t let the evening end with a fizzle. Be intentional about saying goodbye, and initiate one of the following: a handshake, hug, or kiss
- Follow up-
If you had a wonderful time and feel like shooting him/her a casual text later that night or the next day, go for it.
Here’s a quick primer:
“Had a really good time, thanks again!” is fine.
“OMG had the best time EVER, ur sooooo amazing and I can’t wait to see u again. Wanna do brunch with me and my BFFs tomorrow??! xoxox!!!” is not.
Finally, As cliché as it sounds,being yourself is probably the best way to ensure you not only have a good time on a first date, but also get a second date, too.
All the best 😉